Hi Underdogg, Thank you, your posts have been very helpful and gives me hope that I can be at the same state as you are right now. In your first post you said you wanted to change badly? can you please elaborate on what was the reason that propelled you to make those hard choices that made your life better. The reason I am asking is because I have never been any more broken than what I am right now. The worse part about this is that I still have zero motivation to make changes in my life. I constantly day-dream and watch tv shows and feel guilty of wasting so much time at the end of the day, everyday. I have completely lost my confidence and anxiety has become my new friend. It is becoming very difficult for me to look myself in the mirror or tell myself that things will be fine. I don't think if I can even rely on myself anymore. thanks in advance.