Author Topic: Not just desensitized to porn  (Read 1120 times)

Tommygun

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Not just desensitized to porn
« on: April 12, 2013, 02:39:17 AM »
So there's this whole thing about a type of porn losing its novelty and you have to move onto 'harder' stuff..

At the height of my porn use I was also looking at other fucked up shit on websites to do with fights, gore, death..basically all things fucked up (I won't put the websites, cos I don't want to trigger anyone). I was watching 20 videos a day, wouldn't even flinch if I saw a video of someone breaking a leg etc. I was basically desensitized.

Since I stopped porn use and also these videos ie my reboot, I saw an image of a bb player with a broken leg and started feeling light headed and sick..it's almost as if my brain is starting to get normal responses again.

Looking back my head must have been really fucked up. Can anyone else relate to this in anyway?

Selzis

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2013, 03:22:06 AM »
Yep. I'm still on my first days again and could watch gore without much hesitation but it seems you can also get pretty desensitized to that stuff after awhile too.
Don't let fear control you, take advantage of it.

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Tommygun

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2013, 03:25:03 AM »
It puts it in perspective when you show someone and they literally cannot watch and you're sat there fine and unfazed..glad it's not just me!

flamingwind

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2013, 07:58:12 AM »
Yeah I know what you mean. When I have been watching porn for a while, nothing seem too gross or to graphic for me. after a few weeks without porn, I just cannot look at shemale porn without having a stomachache when I'm in the beginning stage of a relapse. But after a few weeks under porn I can eat while watching shemales or other weird things that I shall not name

Tommygun

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2013, 08:17:32 AM »
Yeah I know what you mean. When I have been watching porn for a while, nothing seem too gross or to graphic for me. after a few weeks without porn, I just cannot look at shemale porn without having a stomachache when I'm in the beginning stage of a relapse. But after a few weeks under porn I can eat while watching shemales or other weird things that I shall not name

Ahh the classic combination of shameful porn and food! Haha

Big Lebowski

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2013, 08:20:49 AM »
Its funny you say that, When I was an avid pmo'er I used to watch horror films without a flinch or thinking this and that was sick, but come to think of it now i cringe and some parts and shit.. really weird.

little_rabbit

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #6 on: September 12, 2013, 12:41:03 AM »
So there's this whole thing about a type of porn losing its novelty and you have to move onto 'harder' stuff..

At the height of my porn use I was also looking at other fucked up shit on websites to do with fights, gore, death..basically all things fucked up (I won't put the websites, cos I don't want to trigger anyone). I was watching 20 videos a day, wouldn't even flinch if I saw a video of someone breaking a leg etc. I was basically desensitized.

Since I stopped porn use and also these videos ie my reboot, I saw an image of a bb player with a broken leg and started feeling light headed and sick..it's almost as if my brain is starting to get normal responses again.

Looking back my head must have been really fucked up. Can anyone else relate to this in anyway?

This is a really interesting topic. I can relate a lot. I used to be really scared of violence, maybe due to some things I witnessed as a child, like my uncle beating my cousin with a belt, which was kinda traumatizing. But seeing violence was also always exciting -- I guess I started with "normal" fight videos, 1on1 school yard fights, random crap really, and I always felt bad and shocked afterwards.

It was this kind of frightened excitement, you know? I occasionally opened like 20 tabs of youtube fights and knew that it was bad watching it and knew I'd feel bad afterwards, but it was too enticing.  After reading this topic now, I think I started to become desensitized back then, moving to hooligan fights and just sad things like random guys being stabbed in a shop or people ganging up on a foreigner etc and then I also watched a few of those infamous compilation movies of real deaths and again, I knew it was bad and knew it would haunt my thoughts for quite some time but it was too exciting, too novel, too "prohibited" maybe?

It's definitely easy to get desensitized with those things. It's like after some time you don't even realize anymore how that shit is real and tragic and fucked up.




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ppycat

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Re: Not just desensitized to porn
« Reply #7 on: September 12, 2013, 08:24:33 AM »
what I really mind is loosing daily feelings, not only when watching shocking videos. I am visiting my mother after not seeing her for months (different country) and really, no feelings at all. as if I was at a shop, buying bread. on the road home, I tried thinking of the dogs, my old room, the garden (it's where I grew up) and really, I couldn't be bothered. no feeling at all!

horrible...