Re: Omega Man: Journal

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by Omega Man, Jun 23, 2013.

  1. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    This thread is designed to keep in one place all the valuable information and resources I've gathered along the process. My main journal is way too long for anyone to find anything. I'll just be editing this original post as I have new things to add. This will be mostly external links or links to extended posts from my journal, but I want to start off this thread with some general tips I've learned along the way:

    General Tips:

    1. Post on the forums often. Even if on the journals of others.

    2. A slip is not a defeat! Do not binge. Benefits accumulate. 90 days may take 900 days, stick with the process.

    3. Resist. Relapse? Return, Reset and Repeat.

    4. Anchor habits: pick an existing habit (brushing teeth) and do a new habit (e.g. exercise) right afterwards.

    5. Start small: start with small, easy to achieve habits and build from there. Same with goals if you struggle, set weekly goals on your counter.

    6. Have the mindset of "a new you", not "the old you minus PMO".

    7. Rearrange your existing schedule or interrupt it with new habits to break association triggers

    8. Addictions are impersonal, do not wallow in self-pity if you slip. (thanks alfalfa)

    9. There are biochemical changes that need time, some of these can take 30-60 days or more. Understanding DeltaFosB and it's role is helpful.

    Omega Man posts:

    Omega Man's journal
    Resources (the page you are on now)
    90 Day Recap
    Thoughts From 300 Days
    There Are Only Two Stages In This Process

    Articles and Links:

    Willpower vs Self-Discipline: this article proposes that since we have a limited resource of willpower, instead of using it up resisting bad habits we should instead employ it to establish a long-term healthy lifestyle that will take us away from those bad habits as a side effect. Good stuff.

    Stoicism & Hormesis: Stoicism is basically self-mastery over pleasure, with the intent of enjoying pleasures to their fullest. Hormesis is the concept of inducing small levels of stress to strengthen the body's systems (exercise is one common example).

    "Mastery" by George Leonard (good overview and outline here). Superb book which explains the process of mastering something. His breakdowns on the patterns and mental blocks are invaluable.

    Porn, dopamine and the usual suspects: Salvo Magazine - Slave Master by Donald L. Hilton, Jr.. I found this via Robert Weiss

    5 Ways Your Brain Tricks You Into Sticking With Bad Habits.

    6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You a Better Person

    Sensitization, desensitization and hypofrontality: some info and links I collected on these topics in my journal. Helpful for understanding the physical aspects of willpower and self-control.

    Dopamine, introverts and extroverts.

    Dopamine, novelty and the brain.

    Dopamine and expectations: another extended journal entry with links and quotes about some finer points regarding the dopamine system. Not so much a reward chemical for pleasure, but for meeting expectations. Helps to explain the "endless clicking" obsession we get into looking for that "perfect" image or video.

    Dopamine and the overstimulation of the reward system in the brain.

    The Reason You Keep Relapsing

    Robert Weiss on Addiction Triggers

    Overstimulation and Desensitization — How Civilization Affects Your Brain

    The Growth Mindset

    How Beliefs Can Sabotage Your Behavior (And What You Can Do About It

    Implementation Intentions


    Books:

    "The Willpower Habit" by Kelly McGonigal — incredibly informative and counterintuitive information on how willpower and self-control work. Its more biological than you think. Easy to read science book with activities and actions to take. Highly recommended.

    "The War of Art" by Stephen Pressfield - don't let the "art" in the title throw you off.

    Exercise:

    A basic beginner bodyweight routine based on a lot of reading (and doing):

    - Push-ups: Slowly up/down, as many as possible (AMAP).
    - Bodyweight dips (hands on chair seat). 5-10
    - Planks: get in push-up position, but rest on your forearms. Hold straight as long as possible.
    - Squats: look up proper form online. 10-15
    - Lunges: same as squats. 5-10
    - Inverted rows (search online) or pull-up bar. AMAP

    I'd suggest looking up videos on YouTube for proper form and technique for all of these.

    2-4 sets. At least 3 days a week, but you could probably do 5 days a week with these. Establish the habit, then look to extend the routine. I'd suggest 8-10 weeks with this routine to establish habit.

    Meditation:

    Sit comfortably upright, a chair is fine, and no need to cross your legs. Do so if you prefer. Back support is recommended.

    Close your eyes. Pay attention to the breath going in and out of your nostrils without controlling the breath as much as possible. Pay attention in as much detail, and with as much focus as possible. Count to 7, then start counting again at 1. If you get distracted by thoughts, just gently return your attention to the breat at the nostrils.

    Do this twice daily before meals, but at minimum once daily. Start with one minute, then increase to 2, 5, 10, 20 minutes and more as you get more comfortable with the process. Itching and scratching are fine to do. I base my info on the lessons and books at Advanced Yoga Practices.

    Nutrition:

    I mostly follow the information, nutrition guides and science over at Mark's Daily Apple. It's a modified Paleo diet approach. In short: lots of vegetables and meat, eggs, nuts, healthy saturated fats, no grains, no seed oils, no/low sugar, and limited starches and carbs.

    Podcasts:

    Pornography addiction treatment - Michael Twohig interview at behaviortherapist.com

    Comedian Bill Burr on breaking bad habits and improving yourself. Starts at about an hour into the episode.

    Videos:

    Self Control: Dan Ariely at TEDxDuke - YouTube
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PPQhj6ktYSo

    A humorous take on the PMO struggle from Louis CK:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGgS5GVCZwI

    Mean Genes:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgxYtOv8_pk

    The Pleasure Trap:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jX2btaDOBK8

    Robert Sapolsky - Dopamine Jackpot:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axrywDP9Ii0
    via RanierFoxSign

    Kelly McGonigal, author of The Willpower Instinct:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbjjIId54g8

    Don't be this guy (via Idiocracy):
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hetaBX00wtI
     
  2. Re: Omega Man's Resources

    You probably meant that for me, OmegaMan, thanks. I removed my earlier reply, hoping to make a more meaningful one after going through the linked resources later. Apologies for the confusion caused!
     
  3. greyhoundjoy

    greyhoundjoy Likes tea

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    This is a great, useful, hopeful and supportive thread for a newbie oldie like me - thanks +++
     
  4. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Updated the original post to add some descriptions to some of the links so you know what you're getting into.

    @GHJ: glad this helped!

    @RM: no prob :)
     
  5. boeing123

    boeing123 Guest

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    very useful.. good stuff man
     
  6. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

  7. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

  8. newme60

    newme60 New Member

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    LOUIS!!!!
     
  9. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Humor helps too ;)
     
  10. better_reward

    better_reward High-speed connection is an oxymoron.™

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Interesting clinical take. P addiction is called Problematic Pornography Use. They allow the person with the "problem" to decide if they want to quit all together or get it under control. He also points out the Acceptance and Commitment therapy approach—accepting the arousal and urges as human but learning to diffuse it and that one doesn't have to act on them. Hmmm... tempts me to watch some P to be honest. Not a good sign. Although I must say I resonate that arousal is natural, just not a substitute for managing life's challenges.
     
  11. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Added video: Robert Sapolsky - Dopamine Jackpot:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axrywDP9Ii0

    Via RanierFoxSign
     
  12. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

  13. LOGOS

    LOGOS Personal Best - 233 Days PMO-free

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    This is an awesome compendium of resources, OmegaMan, thanks a million. They don't call you a "Hero Member" for nuffin'. 8)
     
  14. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Thanks and glad they help. I tend to geek out on any topic I get interested in and like to share the discoveries. I just remembered I have another podcast link to add. Need to dig that up.
     
  15. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    You are very welcome, glad they are of help.
     
  16. Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Great resources, Omega! Great humor too ! ;D
     
  17. Hands_Off

    Hands_Off New Member

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    That Louis CK bit was hilarious...
     
  18. Hands_Off

    Hands_Off New Member

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Omega, thanks very much for the resources. I am combing through them. So far I like the Louis CK vid and "Dopamine, introverts and extroverts" I definitely classify as an introvert. There is an interesting book on introverts called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking that my brother turned me on to. Haven't read it yet, but it's in my reading queue...
     
  19. Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Yeah.. Louis CK is f-ing awesome... truth through comedy, often the best medium.
     
  20. Omega Man

    Omega Man Everything counts.

    Re: Omega Man's Resources

    Glad these are of help. I believe humor helps too, the Louis CK bit reminds us we are not alone in this! The part about "you're a tourist, I'm a prisoner… you're Jane Fonda in the tank, I'm John M<cCain in the hut" is so great.

    I've heard many mentions of that "Quiet" book. I need to pick that one up.
     

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