No sensations during sex and orgasm

Discussion in 'Erectile Dysfunction / Delayed Ejaculation' started by maxonian, Sep 13, 2017.

  1. maxonian

    maxonian New Member

    Hello,

    I'm a 30 year old male. I belong to the unlucky minority, that self-discovered prone (lying down) masturbation at the age of 5. I remember the process and culmination being very pleasurable during first few years that I've done it. But somewhere along the way my penis got so desensitized, that I barely got any kick out of it, but continued to do it nonetheless, out of habit and the 'urge' I'd get as a developing young man. I continued with this habit until the age of 26. By that time I had several failed relationships with girls, which fell apart mainly because our sex-life was non-existent, since my penis was so used to extreme pressure and completely different feel that prone masturbation provides, that I just couldnt get it up/keep it up during intercourse with a real girl. At the age of 26 realization that I have serious issue with my penile health finally sinked in. So I researched different resources regarding this matter. It immediately became apparent how much harm prone masturbation causes to a man, so I stopped it cold-turkey. Excersized no-fap/no-PMO (porn, masturbation, orgasm). Started a natural penis enlargement/health routine (stretching, jelqing, kegels), which seemed to make things worse (I attribute this to doing kegels, while having an already tight/weak pelvic floor muscles, without counter-balancing it with reverse kegels (stretching)). I had no girlfriend during this period, so after 6 months of no masturbating I bought Fleshlight device to both take my edge off and to start retraining my penis to sensations of vaginal sex (since so many people over the Internet claimed it's “100% like real vagina”).

    After a while I was able to come using Fleshlight, however – and that's the summary of my current state and gist of my post – the stroking part felt like nothing was going on at all, no sensations, no pleasure. And orgasm itself felt a tiny bit pleasurable but still very weak.

    Couple of years ago I started dating a girl, whom I am with to this day. At the early stages of our relationships I had to rely on Viagra to get it up, but even then my erections were inconsistent – sometimes my penis would be hard enough for penetrative sex and sometimes it would nоt. As our relationship developed and trust deepened and as I (and my dick) have gotten more used to vaginal sex with a real woman, I was able to ween myself off Viagra and arrived to the point where I am at today – I am confident my dick will be up and ready for the task ahead without medication, no stress, no fuss. That said, my erections are definitely not rock-hard. Also my penis tends to get soft(er) when she's on top but quickly returns to it's baseline state when I'm not lying on my back.

    My concern, as stated above, is severe desensitization, lack of sensation during sex and orgasm: when I'm thrusting I feel nothing. Zero. When she's giving me blowjob I feel almost nothing. When I come, it's a very weak feeling.

    These things are hard to describe but I believe there's something many men can relate to, - when I was a young boy sometimes my private bits would grind against some surface during play (mainly when climbing rope or a tree or playing on a kid's playground) and it felt extremely pleasurable, to the point that I'd forgo whatever I was doing and would try to replicate the moves that caused such great sensations, so I'd feel it again. Let's say this feeling had a strength of 10. Subjectively I'd describe the strength of my orgasms as 0.5 or 1, my thrusting as 0.

    During intercourse normally I tend to last around 20 minutes. Around 7-10 minutes when we havent had sex for a week or two for whatever reason and I have a lot of pent up energy.

    So here I am, but no means impotent, yet clearly not 100% healthy either. There's something big missing. Have I wrecked something majorly during many years of abusing my penis with prone masturbation? Maybe. I'm looking for your help and advice.

    PS

    I'll be posting this to a few penile-health related forums and communities. I hope this is not against the rules, because I need all the help that I can get.
     

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