Entering Recovery Mode

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Outsider., Feb 3, 2016.

  1. NoDestination

    NoDestination Active Member

  2. Outsider.

    Outsider. Turning Simple Disciplines Into Massive Success

    @jnv thank you very much my friend, I'm lucky to have you here
    @Thebeg and @NoDestination thank you for the advice and aupport and link.
    The night after I wrote my last post here, I finally MOed, I can make effort but when it's too much... The following day I just sent a WhatsApp to my wife telling her that one month is from far too much and not acceptable, that I'm a man, and have have sexual needs, that im not a machine. She directly answered me : I promise tonight.
    So we had sex the same night, it was very good, she was more expressive when she felt the pleasure growing.... I think that's because my penis is now larger and longer than before, because during the last intercourse it was the same.
    She didn't even noticed or told me that there was a huge difference... As she's "depressed" she doesn't want anything...
    She's overweight and doesn't want / succeed in loosing fat... Concerning myself, I've been working out almost every day since more than a month and I'm becoming more and more lean. She doesn't even bear hearing me saying that I try to avoid junk food etc. I asked her if she had noticed that I'm more and more fit, she just told me no, I don't notice anything... And that it was very clumsy from me to ask her that...
    No dialog, nothing...
    I'm finally kinda alone even if I'm married... I try to spend good time with my kids....
    I'm sad. Very sad not to share my progress with her. I'm alone with myself. Me, myself and I whereas I'm married.......
    Concerning the one month of no sex, it was very special because :
    . She has a 10 (!!!) day blood period
    . She stayed at her mother's house for a week. I never sleep with them when my sister in law and mother in law are there.
    When they both left on holidays, I reached wife and kids there, but she was sleeping ng in the living room. Too many details to explain all.
    But the weirdest is that she O everytime and during sex, seems to really enjoy it. But after....she told me that the longer we wait the better it is. I told her ok, so let's wait 3 months!!!
    It's a really weird and tough situation...
    I came back home alone tonight. But I won't PMO to "get better".
    It's tough to realize that I'm finally alone with this addiction. Telling her that is impossible. I know her well, she would never understand and would consider me like a lame and weak wanker.
    Hopefully I have your support guys. I'm more than happy to get your advices and heartwarming posts here.
     
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
    jnv likes this.
  3. Outsider.

    Outsider. Turning Simple Disciplines Into Massive Success

    More than five months without PMO.
    I'm simply happy to live without this. Life is just normal finally, with ups and downs.
    Very busy with the school start, their sports etc. Super dad is back ;)
    I've just started Kungfu lessons and Tai Shi. I really enjoyed. While Kungfu is explosive and powerful, Tai shi is soooooo slow and peaceful. Very weird but good feelings during it. I hope it'll help me to be more calm. I really think this will help me. Let's see.
     
    jnv likes this.
  4. Outsider.

    Outsider. Turning Simple Disciplines Into Massive Success

    I'm hungry. I'm even starving. Hungry for food (good and intensive workouts and kung-fu sessions) but also starving for sex. I had sex with my wife 2 days ago but it's not enough. I want to bang all the cute chicks I see in the street ... The soooooo gorgeous hostess at work is a huge temptation as well. I made phone call to a sales representative from another company at work, she was really friendly during our first call. I called her back several times, for work purpose but we also laughed and talked about personal things. I checked her on LinkedIn, she's very cute ... I know it's not a good thing to cheat on my wife but after 15years of marriage and a not satisfying sexual life it's becoming more and more complicated ...
    There is also, of course lol, a gorgeous young girl at my kung-fu training ... Paris m├ętro and streets are like a girl parade.... beautifull girls with attractive bodies everywhere, for all the tastes.... It's tough to resist ... Especially after 17 days without MO
    Have to be strong and very careful.
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2017 at 4:00 AM
    Thebeg likes this.
  5. Thebeg

    Thebeg Well-Known Member

    Yeah that sounds heavy. Having sex usually increases the sex drive further, especially if the sex session itself wasn't just enough to fully satiate. I can only try to imagine what a 15 year marriage must be like. Is her sexual interest just low? Any ways to spice things up again?
     
  6. Outsider.

    Outsider. Turning Simple Disciplines Into Massive Success

    I MO'ed two days ago and yesterday. Pressure was to high, seeing very attractive girls all day long, at work (hostess) and in the metro ... I'm not a machine, so not enough sex and big temptations led me to MO.
    I also saw "proposed group" in FB with P stars (the ironical side is that I only have interesting and useful subscription in FB, like health, good eating, fitness etc ... but those girls still appears in the right corner... I think I won't connect anymore to avoid this trigger)... I copied the name of one of them and googled it ... sexy pictures first and then in the evening I watched her fingering herself ... First time I watch P since more than 5 months ... I didn't M but I have to be veeery careful ... My wife refused to have sex yesterday evening (tired ....) but I hope tonight she'll be ok ...I really really hope so ...
    @Thebeg : thanks for posting here mate. Her interest for sex is just very very low, she can easily stay without it, it's not a need for her ... I think it was the same for her mother (from what I understood before his death 10 years ago, my father was in law was also very frustrated).
    To be honest I'm thinking more and more to have sex with another girl. I think that if I have an occasion I won't resist anymore ... I know that's not the best "solution" but I'm not a machine, I'm frustrated. Married but I sometimes tell myself that concerning sex there's no huge difference with being single.
    It's especially tough nowadays because I try to reboot, with no PMO, and the less MO possible. What I don't understand is the fact that during sex she really likes it (moreover since my penis is bigger even if she didn't tell it to me). Before when she refused me to have sex, I had all the vitural girls avaible, binge sessions until I can't even cum anymore, but it's no longer the case, which makes it very tough for me.
    A lot of work and deadlines at work, so it keeps me busy which I consider a good thing (it also forces me to be more efficient etc so that a good occasion to improve myself in this domain).
     
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2017 at 7:41 AM

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