Anyone else ever been addicted to femdom? Help

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by bethechange, Nov 12, 2013.

  1. bethechange

    bethechange New Member

    Completely and hopelessly. Quitting conventional porn was easy compared to this, it's like crack cocaine for me :/

    Anyone else been addicted to femdom/findom/humiliation rubbish?

    I'd love to hear from you if you've recovered also :)
     
  2. Stopper

    Stopper IT'S OVER!!!

    Listen brah. Whether it's femdom, transexuality, gay porn when you're straight, fat guys having sex with midgets...

    All you need to get over it is to just quit watching it. Your brain will diminish those pathways and you'll no longer feel much of a reward coming from the thought.
    But this only works if you just stop watching it. Reading about it, discussing it, all of that, it's not gonna get you to like it any less. Like you said it works like a drug in your head now, treat it like that. Don't judge it, don't look at it from a moral point or if you're embarrassed by it or not. Just know that in order for you to get rid of it you need to stop feeding it, from there on you'll heal.
     
  3. bethechange

    bethechange New Member

    Thanks man
     
  4. JerseyJay911

    JerseyJay911 New Member

    I agree with Stopper as far as quitting your femdom watching habits will curb your appetite for watching porn. But it won't get rid of your fetish if you were born with it. I'm in the same boat myself. I didn't even have to try to quit vanilla porn- it hardly even turns me on. But the fetish stuff- it's like addiction on steroids. I think people like you and I have an uphill battle, and there needs to be more discussion about this on here.
     
  5. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    Hey man this is the type of P that I'm struggling to quit too. I don't think that we were born with it but it escalated over time to this type of P because it created the most dopamine release for our brain. When we go without this we struggle because our brain wants that same level of dopamine.
     
  6. bethechange

    bethechange New Member

    I was going to say there is no way I was born with it, if anything I may have the lowest level femdom tendencies (maybe) that have spiraled upwards on the screen as my addiction has progressed, basically porn has warped my taste.
    The other reason I know is because in real sex, I have never ever desired anything like these fantasies :/
     
  7. JerseyJay911

    JerseyJay911 New Member

    I was turned on by this concept years before I saw my first pornographic image/clip/what have you. I'm convinced that I was born with it. No matter what I do, I doubt it will go away, but I remain hopeful that it will ease as I work through my porn addiction. Hey Gary, if you're around, please chime in. Thanks.
     
  8. Thecutler

    Thecutler Guest

    Hi I'm cutler and I'm a femdom addict.

    For the last 8 years of my life I've watched femdom porn 1/6 times a day. To the point where real sex does not turn me on. Bloody ed.

    I am slowly seeing some process, but man the withdrawals were tough. It is incredibly hard to quit I agree this shit is evil.

    The question is how bad do you want to quit? Me personally I was sick of being a loser and I decided something had to change.
    I got rid of my smart phone (kept making me relapse)
    Got rid of my computer (big sacrifice but who cares)

    I was way too addicted and I decided I could never quit femdom whilst having a computer.

    The thing is girls just don't exist outside of femdom porn, so you're wasting your life, you aren't going to meet a dominatrix and settle down and get married.
    I think the reason femdom porn is so addictive is the amount of talking the girls do during the videos. Some of the girls are very good at acting and the way they insult you during the video really hits home.
    I noticed one day that I was barely horny for femdom videos when the volume was off.
    I think we became brainwashed and now are dicks only react to women saying nasty things. Out of interst how did your porn use escalate ?

    Mine went

    Posters/ vanilla porn/ face sitting/light femdom/scat/ ball busting/cuckold/ humiliation/ and just other really extreme shocking videos. By the end my femdom use had got so extreme I was practically watching videos of women beating men close to death. I even considered looking for femdom on the dark hidden Internet because the thought of how extreme the videos would be there turned me on.

    I noticed the girls have become more attractive in femdom videos over the years. They probably realised how much money they could make. I bet soooo many people are addicted to femdom, think how many videos and different dominatrixs exist, there must be a big demand.

    Whatever I hate this shit I'm not going back. It took my best years, I suggest you take a brave step and make some important changes.
     
  9. bethechange

    bethechange New Member

    It's warped my brain I don't actually like any of this stuff :/
    My addicted brain likes femdom more on the humiliation side not the physical pain side, but I think that's more addictive because it sort of produces stronger feelings of guilt and shame in a way. At the pinnacle of my addiction (might as well be the last time I relapsed, why not) I've watched stuff based on verbal humiliation, scat/peeing, cuckold... which is a fucked up one because it involves a level of homosexual behaviour. And I do not in any way fancy men in real life but once I relapse it goes very badly and my dopamine chalks up until I watch any of this disgusting, demeaning, horrible stuff.

    I don't really want to go into proper specifics because at this stage I don't really want to think about it but I hope that gives you an inclination man :)

    Peace
     
  10. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    For me it started with pictures, soft core solo, girl-girl, soft core, hard core, and ended on this femdom thing. I'm convinced that it is not my normal orientation but that it is what ended up being my last addiction left from porn.
     
  11. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    Cutler, how long did withdraws last for?
     
  12. Tigerblood992

    Tigerblood992 New Member

    Femdom? Pssssssh. I've been hooked to tranny porn for at least 5 years.

    My progression of porn habits and fetishes is typical but eye opening none the less.. It's like watching a tree start as a seed and gradually watching it turn into a 50 foot full grown monster.


    (WARNING, POTENTIAL TRIGGER. I'm listing my progression of porn fetishes)

    -Started out watching vanilla sex porn.. Loved watching white girls get dominated by big black cocks. ----->Anal Sex------>Gang Bangs------>Extreme Throat Fucking-------->Girl being tied up and raped--------(this is were it's gets startling for me)------> Guys getting fucked by women with dildos---------> GUYS FUCKING OTHER GUYS :(------------->"Vanilla" Transexual Porn------->Trannies fucking Trannies-------->Trannies FUCKING GUYS :( --------------> and the most troublesome habit which has compelled me to start the noporn/nofap challenge........------------> Seeking and finding sexual experiences with REAL trannies

    I reached the bottom of the barrel with PMO and adopting new fetishes. I stopped watching and participating in everything i listed above because during this time period, even though i was heavily turned on by alot of those things, I've always thought to myself, I AM NOT FUCKING GAY. That's the part that has always made me feel shameful and want to jump out of a window after PMO'ing to dudes gettiing impaled by a tranny or actually meeting with a tranny.

    Sometimes i wonder if i crossed a threshold were me fetish and liking for transexuals is irreversible..

    I've had unbelievable cravings over the past 30 days, where all i wanted to do was pick up the phone and get my fix, but my "pmo/trannies aren't an option" attitude has kept me on track.

    I guess i won't know whether my fetish is reversible until i experience what i genuinely want to experience, making love to a female.
     
  13. Yes and it escalated from there . now femdom looks like a joke lol , I got to a stage where I can even joke about it haha

    Even though since im here I reduced the PMO time from many times every day to few times each 3- 4 days and with a record of 20 + days , even though I did this , when relapsing my porn tastes escalated , I watched pretty much anything ,

    Upside of this is that I solved my HOCD and reduced my PMO ...still trying to solve whats left

    I am sure about my sexuality but still need this porn like drugs
     
  14. Thecutler

    Thecutler Guest

    At least a month. It was such a miserable month I wanted to die.
    Read my journal to see just how bad the withdrawals were.
     
  15. daone

    daone Where I'm gonna be ought to be uncharted

    Cutler, i'm not gonna quote your entire post but i can second that post, especially women beating men savagely...it got to a point for me where they would brand him, cut, whip, piss on, shit on him and then make him eat it while humiliating him...when those kind of videos were getting boring to me i knew something was very very wrong...its amazing how one month of abstinence gets my dick rock hard just describing it

    Femdom is a killer...plain and simple..it will rob your life of anything good and kill you slowly...speaking from experience, i contemplated suicide i was so depressed because of this shit..now im working my way up..to all the femdom addicts keep focused on the no PMO path. No matter how hard it is, it is worth it
     
  16. stretcher

    stretcher New Member

    Femdom is weird, because it's so contrived. You see all the devices and whatnot they use, and the outfits they put on, and even when I looked at that stuff I still knew, "These dominatrixes have to do what they do in private, not just to hide their identities, but because most people would laugh at them if they saw them prancing around like that, or they would be stared at as freaks, and being laughed at would kill their self-image as these dominant women in whose hands men are putty." They don't just do their thing in dungeons to spare the man's privacy, they're doing it because reality doesn't bear out the identity the men pay them to have. Honestly, I used to go on dominatrix escort sites, and their pages are so pretentious, and I know they're like that because that's what the guys pay for, but it's so hard to take them seriously, even though you want to see them as dominant.

    I dunno, I've never gone to a domme or anything, so I don't know what it's like in person, but it seems like 95% of that fetish is based entirely in the guy's head. You're being ordered around by some woman who's half your size, and who you could easily turn the tables on any time you wanted to. And they talk in this pretentious way that would get them laughed at in the streets. Or you see the girls in humiliation POV clips and for me, personally, the vast majority of them just can't act. They read the script all wrong.

    Femdom was/is a minor fetish for me, not one of my big ones but I'll still look at it sometimes. But it's almost like I have to strain to look past all the corniness in that scene in order to make it sexy to myself. I've seen one or two dommes who can read their scripts right, the rest just come across as idiotic college girls who I'd be apt to slap or laugh at if I was in the same room with them.

    Sorry if this bugs anyone who's put femdom on a pedestal, but I think deconstructing our fetishes in the light of day and talking about their stupidity may help neutralize them to some extent.
     
  17. Thecutler

    Thecutler Guest

    I'm really struggling to figure out why I felt offended by your post.
    Your right though it is all in our minds which is why we can't be addicted to it and expext to find a woman like the ones in the videos, it's not real.
     
  18. stretcher

    stretcher New Member

    Yeah, I'm not knocking the guys who are into it, I understand the mindset behind it because I share it to an extent. But my pride revolts against that aspect of myself, and it defuses the attraction (for me at least) to be able to poke holes in the women's pretensions. Most women aren't interested in playing that kind of role, but some guys like to see women that way, and a domme just plays on that, but doesn't have any power in and of herself - all her power is in the man's head, and she knows it. So it's important to the guy that he be able to revere her, and for someone to slag them like that is to attack the fantasy of their power. Maybe being offended by it is a sign of your attachment to the fantasy? Again, I'm not trying to offend you or anyone else with this, just expose and defuse it.
     
  19. Lysander

    Lysander Member

    I've been to a domme in real life and had ED. She was actually really a sweetheart but the thing is it felt unnatural like we were both playing a role and acting. During the session I felt like I just wanted a real women that I could be making love with. Do you see how addicted I was to online femdom that I could get excited from watching pixels but not the real thing? It's a internet porn addiction.
     
  20. bethechange

    bethechange New Member

    It's certainly all in my head. My brain wants the dopamine and it knows how it can get it. I never wanted it before and certainly when I'm in the company of real girls now cuddling/dancing/hugging/kissing whatever, not a shred of me is thinking about how P is better and I'd rather be doing that, because I'm so IN the moment and loving it as a beautiful experience.
     

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