Another day no PMO. Its nice to be staying sober in June..I think this is the first time ever? I mentioned before if I can stay sober through October (my busy season), then I have a real shot to stay sober for life. Summer is by far the toughest for me and I must stay on this path. Im starting to learn the value of training my mind..that everything happens between my ears. I have fear about $, my business, my future..I've built this big tennis business on public courts and it may be all shut down. The private courts I teach on could easily say "no more, we are tired of all the cars, people", etc. Its very flimsy and risky. I also have my competitors..the country clubs, indoor clubs, parks and rec programs. Other independent pros. The fact that its so physical..sure I could teach 15hrs a week for life, but not 30-40 (which I feel I need for a good income). Its really incredible what I've built..basically a "club" on public and private courts. I feel every year the time is nearer for it all to end. What really needs to happen is a transition to a club..to an official facility with more stability. From there I can promote and advertise more (I cant currently promote my business which is on public courts..it would be like a drug dealer promoting himself!) I can also hire pros. I tried to make it happen a couple years ago by getting the process of a bubble over public courts going, but it was shot down. It really seems the town where I've built my name is the place to do it..I've been here a good ten years now and have seen kids grow up. I've worked with hundreds and hundreds of families. My edited/updated weekly email list is more than 470 families. It would just make sense for the transition to the next level, club ownership, which isn't happening. Its frustrating, but I sense there may be a greater plan in the works. Stay the course..