A Londoner' s journey to a Porn Free life

Discussion in 'Ages 25-29' started by Brit_91_kd, Mar 4, 2018.

  1. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Hey all.

    I have decided to start a journal tracking and detailing my progress.

    A bit of background. Started to look at porn from the age of 14. I am turning 27 in a couple of weeks time. Suffered from pied from the age of 19. As you would expected had some embarrassing experiences in bed. Been addicted to escorts over the last year, been addictive to tranny porn for the last 4 years. Haven't had a GF in over 4 years.

    Had countless relapses in which i am ashamed off however not giving up. My longest streak is a month however that was when I was abroad and had no access to the internet.
     
  2. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 1

    As you would expect I feel pretty numb. Actually work up at after 6 which was an amazement in its self. Just watched some no fap tips on and success stories on YouTube. Have a busy week ahead of me work and driving lessons.

    The porn clip in which i had relapsed too however still in my mind:(
    Glad I made it past today however.

    A very long road ahead for me.
     
  3. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 2

    Again as like day 1 felt a bit numb. Have the tendency to have depleted energy from around 12ish as I am in work. Felt really figtued going into my driving lesson.
     
  4. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 3

    did not get the best of sleeps. Got into work feeling really deprived of sleep. Started at looking at new diets. The Alkaline diet looks interesting so been doing a bit of research as my energy levels are depleted. Watched some more No Fap advice videos on YouTube.

    Roll on day 4!
     
  5. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 4

    Nothing much to report on tbh. Wasnt as tired as yesterday getting up this morning.
    Got a lot more done at work which I am pleased with.
    Also vowed to make more high alkaline smoothies so after work went to the shops to buy a range of greens. Hopefully overtime I see an improvement in my health.

    Roll on day 5!
     
  6. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 5

    Nothing much to report on. As mention still early days.

    My sleep needs improving even though I am going to bed more early.

    Roll on day 6!
     
  7. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 6.

    Apologies for the late update. I had a very early night.

    Not much again to really report. This pinch of motivation is however fulling my body which I guess is a good thing.

    In a couple of hours I'l be completing a week. I know it is still a long long way to go but I am taking baby steps for now!
     
  8. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Back at Day 0.

    Went to seven days. Had a complete binge with drink as i was out for yhr whole of the night got home today and yep .... relapsed.

    This is not easy but as someone said Rome was not built in a wasn't built in a day...
     
  9. LittleGiant

    LittleGiant Member

    Seems like we have a fair bit in common. I also live in London, haven't had gf in years and have been really struggling with hardcore genres of porn the last 4 years, had pied most of that time.

    Sorry about your most recent relapse. Recovery can be a very non-linear process so don't be disheartened!
     
  10. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Hey man.

    Ok cool. I live in south London.

    I was in the coast for a party had so much to drink got home the next day and yep relapsed.

    Just goto start the momentum again.
    Thanks for the kind words pal.
     
  11. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 1

    Felt ok bearing in mind I had relapsed. Didn't feel numb and was able to hit my work targets.

    Still jucing them greens too.

    Roll on Day 2!
     
  12. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 2.

    Just like yesterday didn't feel numb. Was able to get a lot done at work.
    Really aiming just to put last week behind me and surpass the 7 days I did last week.

    I know that last week I had a urge to read so will continue to read my kindle. Still have a few books to go through.

    Bring on Day 3!
     
  13. LittleGiant

    LittleGiant Member

    How's it going dude?
     
  14. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Hi man. Not going good man. Relapsed yesterday.

    Not giving up though!
     
  15. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 1.

    Firstly I would like to apologies for my absence from this site. I apologies for not being on here updating my journal as I once was.

    As you you will already now, I had relapsed yesterday. I know disappointed. Tbh I had relapsed quite a bit over the last couple of weeks. I take full responsibiity for my actions.

    I can't go back to the last couple of weeks and amend the wrongs. You know I would if there was an opportunity!

    Ok so moving forward I just completed Day 1. Most of my day was spent in bed due to the effects of last night. I feel like I am in this bubble I don' know how to explain it. Like I am trying to break out this bubble but I can't. I think when I started this thread I got onto 8 days then relapsed. It's going to be hard but I will do my all just to break this day period and progress from there.

    I just forgot how lazy and demotived you can be starting your No fap again.....

    Roll on Day 2.
     
  16. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 2.

    Nothing much to report on. A much more productive day compared to yesterday.

    Roll on day 3
     
  17. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    :( relapsed 16:33pm

    Back to Day 0
     
  18. Brit_91_kd

    Brit_91_kd Member

    Day 1.

    Productive. Started to take cold showers. Will ensure that this becomes more of familir thing.

    Also have a posted note with a routine in which i will follow. It will hopefully keep me busy.

    Roll on day 2
     
  19. BeInControl

    BeInControl New Member

    Hi mate. Do you excersise? Pray/Meditate? Socializing (without drinking) My story is similar to yours, I have just finished day 7 (first attempt of nofap) and have been doing all those things above including sleeping 6-7 hours each day and eating healthy. I also have cut off movies and TV. And seriously never felt better, idk why I should relapse. I feel like the intense training and the coldshowers+sleep and diet is doing the work. Keep it up dude and stay strong :)
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2018
  20. That_guy

    That_guy Member

    Hey bro,

    Nice you are making such an effort. You are improving just given the fact you are attempting to change. Do you have a clear plan how you will attack this? Addiction is a powerful thing and for me has been excrutiatingly tough.

    I see far to often people on this forum (myself included) go through the motions of trying to make changes. Yes it's great you are attempting and you will be gaining benefits. But we have to be absolutely serious about this problem if we want to change, at least that's how I feel for myself. The times I have made it my first priority in life are the times I have had good streaks and actually started to make a life away from addiction. The times I have just gone through the motions are the times where the addiction always comes back, that's what addiction does. We have to be real about this!

    All the best
     

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